Friday, March 14, 2025

Introduction to Trauma-Informed Spiritual Direction

Introduction to Trauma-Informed Spiritual Direction

As a spiritual companion, you may journey with individuals who are processing trauma—whether from personal experiences, religious harm, or communal crises. Even when trauma isn’t at the forefront of a seeker’s mind, it often surfaces. Simply being human in this world means encountering trauma. 

Marginalized identities—whether related to race, gender, disability, or sexuality—carry additional layers of trauma. But even those who hold privilege have been shaped by the ways they were conditioned to uphold it (e.g., “Don’t be a sissy”).

Creating a trauma-informed, safer space is essential in spiritual direction. The five guiding principles of trauma-informed care are safety, choice, collaboration, trustworthiness, and empowerment. The foundation is ensuring both the physical and emotional safety of the individual.

Trauma Bonding Painting by Melissa Lutes

If possible, consider working through:

  • My Grandmother’s Hands by Resmaa Menakem
  • Healing from Trauma by Jasmin Lee Cori
  • The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

As always, take care of yourself while learning about trauma. Your own experiences matter, and healing is an ongoing process for all of us.

The Body Holds Trauma

Trauma is not only a psychological or emotional experience—it is deeply physiological. The body remembers trauma, often holding it in tension, pain, or nervous system dysregulation long after the mind has tried to move on. This is why body-based approaches can be essential for healing.

Many trauma survivors find that practices engaging the body—such as yoga, chanting, breathwork, or body scanning—can help release stored trauma and restore a sense of presence. However, these same practices can also activate unresolved trauma, making it important to introduce them gently and always with the seeker’s consent.

Some seekers may naturally gravitate toward cognitive or verbal processing, while others may need more somatic or ritual-based healing. A trauma-informed spiritual companion recognizes this diversity and listens for what resonates with each individual.

Religious Trauma

For some seekers, trauma is experienced as a rupture in their relationship with the divine. For others, spirituality is a source of resilience and healing. Religious trauma often involves loss of community, existential crisis, or attachment wounds related to one’s image of the sacred. Some seekers carry intergenerational religious trauma—rooted in forced conversions, colonization, or religiously sanctioned violence—that continues to shape their spiritual lives.

A trauma-informed spiritual companion holds space for these complexities, neither dismissing faith as inherently harmful nor assuming that traditional spiritual practices will be healing for all. The goal is to listen deeply, honoring each seeker’s journey without imposing a specific path to healing.

Shiva (Lord of the Dance) photo by Peter F
(“We come into this world, we go out of this world. Do not despair, life is a dance.)

Cultural Considerations in Trauma Healing

Healing from trauma is deeply shaped by cultural traditions, spiritual beliefs, and communal practices. Many cultures have long-standing methods for processing and releasing trauma, often in ways that differ from Western psychological models. Some Indigenous traditions use smudging with sacred herbs to cleanse emotional and spiritual burdens, while African and African diasporic traditions incorporate drumming and rhythmic movement to regulate the nervous system. In some communities, storytelling serves as both a means of processing pain and preserving resilience, while others engage in communal lament—ritualized grieving that allows sorrow to be expressed and witnessed in a shared space. Recognizing and honoring these diverse approaches can help spiritual companions avoid imposing a singular, Western-centric understanding of trauma and healing.

Rather than assuming what healing “should” look like, a trauma-informed spiritual companion listens for the seeker’s own cultural framework. Some seekers may feel most at home in embodied or ritual-based healing, while others may prefer cognitive or silent reflection. 

Ask open-ended questions such as:

  • “What practices or traditions have helped you feel grounded or connected in difficult times?”
  • “Are there ways your community understands healing that you find meaningful?”

By centering the seeker’s lived experience, you create space for healing practices that resonate with their spiritual and cultural wisdom.

Consent and Boundaries in Trauma-Informed Spiritual Direction

Trauma-informed spiritual direction begins with consent and clear boundaries. Trauma can leave a person feeling powerless, so it is essential to offer choices at every stage of the spiritual direction journey. Seekers must feel they can share—or not share—without pressure, expectation, or fear of judgment. [See also this post on ethical spiritual direction]

Consent as an Ongoing Practice

Consent in spiritual direction is not a one-time agreement; it is a continuous process. Trauma responses can shift unexpectedly, and what felt safe to discuss one week may feel overwhelming the next. Consider these practices:

  • Ask before exploring sensitive topics. “Would you like to talk more about that, or would you prefer to focus on something else today?”
  • Give seekers control over their pace. If emotions arise, offer options: “Would you like to take a breath before continuing, or pause here?”
  • Check in before offering practices. “Some people find grounding exercises helpful—would you like to try one together?”

Seekers should always feel free to say “no” without explanation. A trauma-informed space honors a seeker’s boundaries without requiring justification.


Balustrade by B52_Tresa (Pixabay)

Holding Boundaries with Care

A well-boundaried space helps seekers feel safer and more in control. As a spiritual companion, you model healthy relational boundaries, which can be deeply healing for trauma survivors. Consider:

  • Time Boundaries: Start and end on time. This reliability builds trust and reinforces a sense of safety.
  • Emotional Boundaries: You are a witness, not a fixer. A seeker’s pain is not yours to carry.
  • Physical Boundaries: If you meet in person, be mindful of proximity and any gestures (e.g., offering a comforting touch) that may not feel safe for a trauma survivor.

Boundaries are not barriers; they are the framework for a safer, trust-filled relationship.

Keeping a Seeker Grounded in the Present

When a seeker shares about trauma, they may become emotionally or physically flooded. Their nervous system may react as if the past trauma is happening again. A trauma-informed spiritual companion gently helps reorient them to the present moment when needed.

Simple grounding techniques include:

  • Time orientation: “It’s [day of the week]. You are here, now, in [location].”
  • Sensory grounding: “Can you name five things you see in this room? Four things you can touch?”
  • Breath awareness: “Can you notice your breath? Let’s take a few slow breaths together.”
  • Choice-based grounding: “Would it help to hold something tangible—a cup of tea, a stone, or fabric?”
  • Body awareness: “Where do you feel supported by your chair right now?”

The goal is never to force a seeker out of their emotions but to offer them an anchor in the present moment so they can choose how to engage with their experience. Some grounding exercises (especially body-based ones) can be activating for trauma survivors, so seekers should always have the option to opt out. [See also this blog post on Embodied Practices.]

Trauma-Informed Presence

Beyond consent, boundaries, and grounding, presence is a core element of trauma-informed spiritual direction. A trauma survivor may not need advice or solutions but rather a deeply attuned witness to their story.

  • Regulating your own nervous system: Seekers often unconsciously attune to your presence. A calm, steady demeanor helps them feel safe.
  • Silence as a tool: Allowing spacious silence after a seeker speaks can help them process without pressure to explain.
  • Mirroring and validation: Simple affirmations like “That sounds incredibly painful” or “You’re not alone in this” can help counter the isolation of trauma.



"The Good Samaritan" by Vincent Willem van Gogh (public domain)

Recognizing Trauma Responses in Sessions

Some seekers may not openly identify as trauma survivors, but certain signs might indicate past trauma is present:

  • Emotional flooding: Sudden overwhelm, tearfulness, or shutting down.
  • Disassociation: Spacing out, difficulty recalling details, feeling “unreal” or numb.
  • Extreme alertness, scanning the room, difficulty relaxing.
  • Avoidance: Changing the subject when certain topics arise, laughing off painful experiences.

Being aware of these signs allows you to gently adjust your approach, offering grounding or pacing the conversation to avoid re-traumatization.

Companion Care: Tending to Our Own Trauma Awareness

As spiritual companions, our ability to hold space for seekers depends on how well we tend to our own emotional and spiritual well-being. Trauma—whether personal or vicarious—can activate our nervous systems, pulling us out of presence and into our own emotional reactions. If we are unaware of our own wounds, we may unconsciously center ourselves, offer advice instead of presence, or struggle to hold steady when a seeker shares difficult experiences.

“Compassion fatigue” and “secondary trauma” are real risks in this work, and regular supervision and spiritual companioning for the companion is crucial. [See also this post on Supervision]

To stay present rather than reactive, we must engage in ongoing personal reflection and care:

  • Notice your own activations. If a seeker’s story brings up strong emotions, acknowledge them internally and return to presence. Seek supervision or support outside of the session.
  • Practice self-regulation. Breathwork, movement, or brief pauses can help settle your nervous system when needed.
  • Engage in your own healing work. Therapy, spiritual direction, or supervision provides a space to process personal experiences so they don’t overwhelm your capacity to companion others.
  • Honor your limits. If you feel overextended or activated, it’s okay to take time for restoration. You cannot offer what you do not have.

A trauma-informed approach is not just about the seeker—it includes companion care as an ethical responsibility. When we prioritize our own healing and grounding, we create a space where seekers can share their experiences without carrying the weight of our unprocessed reactions.

These resources offer a starting place for grounding your spiritual direction practice in trauma-informed care. As you engage, remember: your own healing matters, too. Be gentle with yourself.

Final Thoughts

A trauma-informed approach prioritizes safety, trust, and choice, helping seekers explore their spiritual journey without being overwhelmed by past wounds. Through consent, boundaries, and grounding practices, spiritual direction becomes a space where healing can unfold at a seeker’s own pace.

At the same time, spiritual companions must tend to their own emotional and spiritual well-being. Trauma—whether personal or vicarious—can activate our nervous systems, making self-care, supervision, and personal reflection essential. We cannot offer what we do not have. By caring for our own healing, we create a steadier, more attuned presence for those we companion.

Together, we’ve got this.


Beloved, you are whole, holy, and worthy,

Rev. Amy

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For Further Reading

General Trauma-Informed Spiritual Direction

Religious Trauma

Bibliography on Religious Wounding (Selected Titles):

  • Carol Howard Merritt, Healing Spiritual Wounds
  • Reba Riley, Post-Traumatic Church Syndrome
  • Teresa Pasquale, Sacred Wounds
  • Marlene Winnell, Leaving the Fold
  • Jennifer Baldwin, Trauma-Sensitive Theology

Community Trauma

Somatic Practices for Trauma Healing

Books on Trauma and Healing

  • Resmaa Menakem, My Grandmother’s Hands – Explores trauma through the lens of racialized experiences and body-based healing.
  • Jasmin Lee Cori, Healing from Trauma – A survivor-oriented guide to trauma recovery.
  • Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score – A foundational text on the physiological effects of trauma.
  • Peter Levine, Waking the Tiger – Introduces somatic experiencing as a trauma healing method.
  • Hillary L. McBride, The Wisdom of Your Body – Focuses on embodiment and healing trauma through reconnecting with the body.
  • Gabor Maté, The Myth of Normal – Examines trauma as a systemic issue rather than just an individual experience.
  • Vanessa R. Sasson, Yasodhara and the Buddha – Explores trauma of abandonment and grief through a Buddhist lens. (Annotation: Added for a non-Western perspective on trauma.)

Online Lectures and Videos



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